The symptoms of midlife crisis are numerous. According to the Journal of Psychology in an article written by D.L. Shek, the midlife crisis is often thought to include: worries about the future, inability to have fun, health concerns, a deteriorating marital relationship, a negative attitude about work, and stress over taking care of elderly parents. In other words, the midlife crisis is the time when one recognizes that the rest of his life will be based on a different set of realities and responsibilities than he has previously known. The key idea is the “rest of one’s life.” In past decades there was not so much focus on the “rest of your life,” just your life. Brought into this world kicking and screaming, you moved forward, kept going and then, one day, you did and it was over. The future (old age, financial woes, health problems, etc.) was not yet the bogeyman that it was to become.
To further confuse the issue, midlife crisis does not seem to be the real concern. The prospect of getting old is what people really seem to fear. We loathe the idea of a future of nose hairs and no hair. To reverse the aging process we take human growth hormone. To improve the texture of our faces we wear masks made of fruits and vegetables and other exotic substances. Many men purchase Viagra to try to regain their sexual prowess. Women get breast implants and have liposuction to fight against the perceived ravages of aging. All of these procedures cost a small fortune. The fountain of youth is not filled with water but with liquid gold.
Does anyone know when old age begins? Other stages of life are more easily defined and measured. You are basically a child until you are 12. At 13 you become a teenager. Twenty-one qualifies you as an adult. Retirement age continues to rise. People are living longer all the time. But when do you get old? I adhere to the definition that old age is “ten years older than you are.” It’s great to never grow old.
So is the midlife crisis a myth or is it real? It depends on whom you ask. Fifteen-hundred Chinese men and women between the ages of 30 and 60 were given a number of questions relating to midlife issues. The results showed that while some of the participants were dissatisfied with their work and personal achievement, the majority did not indicate that their level of dissatisfaction was at the crisis level. Obviously, if you ask a middle-aged man or woman who happens to be from mainland China how they are dealing with their midlife crisis they will probably look at you strangely.
On the other hand, if you bring up the question of midlife transition with someone affluent that lives in Newport Beach you are likely to receive a normal look and a reasonable answer. What type of symptoms might this person describe as being brought about by his crisis? He may feel bored or frequently tired. He may have difficulty concentrating. Compulsions regarding food, alcohol or sex may become troublesome. Feelings of anger and irritability may be prevalent.
If you are experiencing these symptoms and consider yourself to be middle-aged then you may be dealing with midlife transition. It will only become a crisis if you let your mind be overrun by fear and other emotions that are the enemy of logic. Stay rational and remember that a midlife crisis is not actually a physical problem. It is a state of mind. Here are some suggestions on how to counteract the symptoms of midlife crisis:
Whatever negative feelings you have regarding aging, loss — or frustrations — are inevitable as we get older. Talk about them with someone.
Improve your nutrition and try and get more exercise.
Pick up a new hobby or take a class in a unique subject.
Set new goals that are exciting and attainable.
Travel somewhere you have never been before.
A midlife crisis is not tangible but conceptual. If you are one of those people who are experiencing a midlife crisis then I am sure it is as real as high blood pressure. Then again, if the whole idea strikes you as a bunch psychobabble publicly hyped to create clientele for shrinks, well, you’re right too.
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